I know you feel it too—that aching sense that you don’t have what it takes, will never have what it takes, and don’t even have a clue what it takes. And that’s just in trying to do your make up in the morning.
I am not enough.
I’m terrible at doing my own hair, I don’t look great in peplum, karaoke is not my jam, and I can’t flip an omelette.
I also am a selfish person, I am only a “good friend” when I want to be, I get easily irritated by things not going my way, and I often speed.
I am not enough. I will never be enough.
But here’s the thing we forget: We were never supposed to be enough.
In Eden, God provided for all of Adam and Eve’s needs. They dwelt in their dependence and relationship with the father. Things went south when they decided God wasn’t enough and they wanted to be.
In Jeremiah 2:13, the prophet writes the two most evil things we have done:
My people have committed two evils: they have forsaken me, the fountain of living waters, and hewed out cisterns for themselves, broken cisterns that can hold no water.
We have decided God was not enough and we have decided to look elsewhere to fulfill our out enoughness.
Friend, there is a reason that when you look at your life, you feel an ache that something is missing. There is a reason I look at my work and feel that it is not where it needs to be. Even the things I am good at, I find discouragement that there is always someone better or more recognized for that thing.
It’s because I am try to drink from a bone dry well that will never satisfy. I will never be satisfied by my own ability or in what other people or things can provide.
Our brokenness, our longing, our not-enough-ness is supposed to be the craving that draws us back to the only one who can satisfy it. Jesus.
For too long, I’ve been depressed by the fact that I will never look right, say the right thing, or be on the right thing. I beat myself up over where I think I should be, or have done. Small things, like forgetting to send an email before the meeting or even spilling tea inside my bag (True story last week) send me into a tailspin when they really shouldn’t get to me.
I say this: Give it a rest. Rest in the fact that your lack has been covered completely by His righteousness. Mistakes, brokenness, hurts—they do not have the final word. Do not stress about it. Do not let it weigh you down.You are enough only because your God is enough. You will never be enough on your own.
Jesus’ ministry was one of demonstrating his abundance. I cannot wait to get into this further over the next few weeks. For now, know this:
You don’t have to be enough. Jesus is an abundance.