Category: Lex’s World

Daily Graces

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Lex's World

I was recently reminded of a blog post that posed the question, “What’s saving your life right now?” The lovely Anne Bogel talked about how we so easily can get caught up in that situation or feeling that is “killing us”, but how often do we recount the things that are saving us?

This was a great concept to think on as I find myself in a mid-season slump—the newness of summer has worn off, everything I look forward to is too distantly in the future to do anything about, and things have just slowed down. It’s not a bad season. It’s one that’s calling me to faithfulness and reordering.

I love summer—the slower pace, the great weather, all the opportunities to enjoy my people and my city. But so often, I forget about these things and instead get caught up in busy-ness, producing, and just plain discontent. I spend my time paying attention to that which is burdensome and ignore the daily graces that abound.

So here’s a short list of the daily graces I’m choosing to appreciate this week:

Good books

My July is a little slower than my June and August and it’s been a great chance to tackle my ever-growing to-be-read list. I’ve had a great time digging into Blake Crouch’s Dark Matter and Jamie Smith’s You Are What You Love. Next up? I’m breaking into my first Steven King novel—it’s so about time.

Tea

It’s no secret I have a tea problem. In attempting to carve out space for liturgy and good habits in my daily life. Starting the day with tea forces me to slow down my morning. It also gives me motivation to get up with the alarm rather than pressing snooze for the fifth-time.

Taking the time to make the tea and then enjoy the tea helps give shape and perspective for the rest of the day. It’s a little reminder to take a moment and acknowledge the one who made the tea leaves and the morning and think on who my day belongs to.

Frequent Writing Time

I’m getting better a making time for my writing during a given week. I’m not great at it, but better counts for something! I’ve been so refreshed and challenged by the editing process and it’s been really satisfying.
I think any creative outlet for even the smallest amount of time brings the refreshment one needs in a hum-drum season. It’s life-giving.

This Playlist

Just click here. Happy music makes for happy summers.

Women’s Work

Tsh Oxenreider has been hosting a great series on her podcast, The Simple Show. “Women’s Work” is a series exploring the work of artists, entrepreneurs and other great women who are doing what they love in a creative manner. I have learned so much as a storyteller and professional and it’s only half-way through the series. Worth the listen!

Fresh Fruit

One of my favorite things about summer is all the fresh things you can buy so easily from local sources! Cherries have been great this year and we’ve done so much with strawberries in our house—it’s been great! Over the weekend, I made a salad topped with peaches and goat cheese—definitely a new favorite.

 

What daily graces are you dwelling on right now? I’d love to hear about them in the comments!

What I Wish the Church Had Taught Me about Singleness By Gina Dalfonzo

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Lex's World, Singleness, Spirituality

One By One by Gina DalfonzoWhen a friend who works at Baker Publishing sent me a photo of the cover of Gina Dalfonzo’s debut release last November, all I could think was, “Hallelujiah! It’s about time someone unpacked the relationship between singles and the church!”

Gina has graciously agreed to guest post this week. Her words were and encouragement to me and I know they will be for you. One by One: Welcoming the Singles in Your Church is in stores this week. You can purchase a copy here.

When I was in my mid-20s, I started work at a place where one of my colleagues was a 40-year-old single woman. She was a very nice woman—good at her job, easy to talk to, and pleasant to work with. But—true confession time—for a long time I felt a little bit freaked out whenever she was around.

Why? It’s hard and embarrassing to explain. Frankly, I’m ashamed when I look back at my own naïve and immature frame of mind. I felt freaked out simply because she was single and 40—and there were not many voices in my life telling me that this was a good or even an okay thing.

My mother, to be sure, had always wisely told me that there was nothing wrong with staying single if I didn’t meet a man I truly wanted to marry. But, though I appreciated the principle, I had never really taken that idea seriously. Of course I was going to find a man I wanted to marry—didn’t every woman? Just because my own dating life had been pretty sparse up to that point didn’t mean he wasn’t going to walk into my life eventually. That was how it worked.

Except that for this woman, that wasn’t how it had worked. And her presence made me think, “If it happened to her, who’s to say it couldn’t happen to me?”

But, remarkably, she seemed okay with her singleness. It was all the more remarkable because she was a Christian, and Christians, naturally, were marriage- and family-focused. That had been my experience my whole life. All the Christian dating books talked about how God would bring your destined mate into your life if you just did everything right. Rarely was the idea of permanent singleness brought up . . . and when it was, it was not usually brought up in a good way.

Like when Leslie Ludy wrote in When God Writes Your Love Story about her struggles to trust God before she was married:

I pictured myself trusting God with this precious area of my life, only to end up sitting in a long, gray, tentlike dress, staring forlornly out the window and rocking my life away in a rocking chair. . . . Looking back, I laugh at such a thought. That was before I learned what a true romantic God is. If I had only known what he had planned for me . . . I never would have doubted for a minute!

In her earnest effort to persuade people that God is in charge of our love lives—a great thing—Ludy inadvertently ended up painting a terrible picture of lifelong singleness—not such a great thing. If only she, and other Christian writers on the subject, had managed to convey that God is good and life is good whether you get married or not, what a blessing it would have been to many who started losing faith as time passed and no God-ordained spouse showed up.

If there is one thing I wish I had heard from the church in my adolescence and young adulthood, it’s this: Even if you never get married, you’ll be okay. Extended singleness is not some terrible wasteland where the unworthy are left stranded and forsaken.

Oh, it can be hard, don’t get me wrong. It can be really, really hard. But even if God mysteriously turns down your petitions for marriage, even if you go for years and years wondering why it just isn’t happening for you, that doesn’t mean He doesn’t love you. And it definitely doesn’t mean He’s left you alone. He’s not the kind of God who does that.

Today, I’m the one who’s in my 40s and still single. I don’t know whether my younger friends ever feel weird around me for that reason. If they do, that’s all right; I’ve been there, and I understand. But more than anything, this is the message I want to send them: Single life is just another kind of life. Sometimes it’s painful, sometimes it’s beautiful. Sometimes it makes you lonely, and then sometimes it brings moments that are gloriously fulfilling. It may not be the life you expected, but it can still be a really good life.

It’s true that, if you never get married, you’ll struggle and you’ll suffer—because that’s what life is like. It brings struggles and suffering to us all, in all kinds of different ways. But you can have help facing those struggles when you hold on to God and His promises—His real promises.

For, contrary to what all those well-intentioned writers and teachers and thinkers told you, God never promised that everyone gets a husband or a wife. There’s no divine formula that automatically makes it happen. God is not some cosmic Oprah who proclaims, “You get a spouse! And you get a spouse! Everybody gets a spouse!”

What He does promise is that He will never leave you nor forsake you. And with Him in your life, no matter what, you will be okay.

Gina Dalfonzo is the author of One by One: Welcoming the Singles in Your Church (Baker, 2017).

Heft and History: Italian Reflections

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Lex's World

Walking the streets of Florence, cone of gelato in hand, I was floored yet again. All day we had been wandering from one end of the city to another and every where you turned, the Cattedrale di Santa Maria del Fiore was somewhere in sight.

The structure stands multiple stories higher than any other structure in the city, as if keeping watch of the small red-roofed buildings nestled in around her. Walking the Florentine streets, the heft of the building looks impossible—like it’s just an incredibly detailed theatre backdrop.

But that was exactly what Italy was for me—the possible impossibilities that have shaped not only the culture we were visiting, but the culture that shapes all of us now.

Having just returned from Iceland, I was happy with the adventure, but also feeling an itch to see a place with a little more history and possibly some art. One nearly-too-good-to-be-true Groupon Getaway email, a text to a friend, and an Italian vacation was in the works.

Audrey and I had both been to Europe before and were more than excited to live out some chick-flick inspired Italian day dreams. (Her’s was Under the Tuscan Sun, mine was The Lizzie McGuire Movie. What can I say, I’m a woman of refined taste…)  Mostly, we just wanted to see everything we could—art, architecture, food: bring it on!

The view from the castle above San Gimignano. This city influenced a lot of the location of my novel.

Like the cathedral in Florence, I felt the sense of impossibility everywhere. Walking into the Colosseum seemed like a trick to my eyes. Was I actually here? Seeing the orators podium in the forum, standing under the ceiling of the sistine chapel, overlooking San Gimignano from castle walls—it was hard to believe this was all real and not some elaborate set of replicas.

I didn’t hit me until our second-to-last day in the country. We were visiting the Shelly-Keats House beside the Spanish Steps—the house where John Keats lived out his last days. As we listened to a museum employee share some history of the home, I became distracted by the display case right in front of me.

Two scraps of paper were enclosed behind the glass, covered in a scripted handwriting. It might have been exhaustion talking, or relief in surviving the Roman metro system (which was stilly that I feared it because it was one of the easiest public transport systems to navigate), but I began to weep. Openly. Not like sobbing, but there was some streaming involved.

It was a draft of “Lamia” in Keats own hand.

Seeing the artifacts of those who have gone before—the art and history and brilliant minds that have served has the shoulders we stand upon was incredible. My art has directly benefited from Keats’. Keats was directly influenced by the ancient Greek and Roman artists and philosophers whose work we saw at the Vatican the next day. My faith has directly benefited from Paul and Peter, both of whom were martyred in Rome, the capital of Christendom from centuries. It’s all interwoven.

And the fabric of our culture continues to borrow threads from those who came before as one day our threads will be used in large and little ways by those who will follow after us.

People ask what was the most meaningful or moving part of the trip and I think that is it: the heft and history of what we saw.

Bible College Spinster: Single, but Single-Minded

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Lex's World, Singleness

 

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

A pastor I really respect from my church made the statement that to have a pure heart meant that one was single-minded.

Coming out of a Christian culture obsessed with sexual-purity, my teenaged self had always just assumed the beatitude was connecting to saving sex for marriage. Hearing this new definition as a young adult struck a chord with me.

Single-minded. Having one single driving purpose. A lone resolve.

Had I ever been after just one thing?

I wrote previously about the realization that I have been pursuing things other than Christ. This has been the case for, well, forever. Encountering the question, “Have I ever been single-minded?” The answer was no, Definitely not.

This begged a different question, though: If I had other driving purposes competing for my attention, what were they?

There were multiple answers, but the biggest one was embarrassing to me.

I had read a book in high school that was very influential in me devoting my life to Christ. It was also very influential in cultivating some very militant thoughts toward dating, modesty, and culture that have take the ten years since reading to be set straight by scripture and patient, truth-minded people. God uses all things, I guess…

The author stated that she believed that if you truly wanted to be married in your heart-of-hearts, God would grant that in his time. She based this out of Psalm 37, where David writes, “Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

Listening to the pastor talk about single-mindedness all those years later, I was struck by the fact that I had been following God for all the wrong reasons.

I had literally been pursuing God in hopes that he would provide someone to pursue me. And that wasn’t happening and I was growing disillusioned.

I was following Jesus because I believed that if I followed him hard enough, he would give me the desires of my heart. Like he was a magic boy-friend producing genie.

Call me double-minded with impure motives. Color me foolish. Trust me, I felt it. By the grace of God, I felt it.

In the couple years since being presented with this, I’ve since had a chance to look at Psalm 37 again. And here is the question I have:

I was looking at that verse like God was in an infomercial. “Follow me in the next ten minutes and I’ll throw in whatever you want!” What if he is not promising to give us what we desire right now if we throw in our lot with him, but something bigger.

What if he is saying that when we follow him, he will give us something for our hearts to truly desire—that he will give us desire in and of itself?

As I have prayed for single-mindedness rather than an end to my singleness, I have found that the spirit is cultivating something new in me.

Yes, I still long for a partner, but there is a new trust that if that doesn’t happen, it will be all right. There is beginning to be a desire Jesus more than a husband. Delighting in the Lord becomes more and more the desire of my heart.

I still cannot say than I am single-minded, but by God’s grace,  he has begun to change my tastes. He is cultivating a purity of heart that I am not capable of doing on my own. This cultivation reveals my desire for love and acceptance, and wholeness that my double-hearted nature wants me to believe will be fulfilled with lesser things. It is through time in the word, in prayer, and in community with the body of Christ that my heart sees what it needs to focus on and what it truly desires.

So yes, I may be single. But that also may be what God is using to cultivate single-mindedness.

Friday Favorites: May 2017

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Friday Favorites

Something to try: Healthy Farm Girl Deodorant

I am continually on a quest or find natural health and beauty products that work. Something I’ve always been trying, but failing to find something that works? Natural deodorant.

Your average deodorant has dangerous chemicals and there is nothing good that can come from antiperspirant. After trying a salt stick (messy and fairly ineffective even after a month) and Tom’s (had a mystery ingredient I was allergic to—nothing like a rash in your pits!) I had all but given up on my search.

And then a lovely blogger friend of mine introduced a deodorant line in her natural beauty product store.

This stuff is amazing! I’ve worked out, danced at concerts, ran the streets of Grand Rapids to make a meeting on time and have smelled great all the while. I highly recommend this product. Even after 24 hours of travel on vacation, I still smelled fresh. (-ish, because let’s face it, plane grime is a real thing.)

My scent is wildflower, but I can’t wait to lemon grass vanilla. There are also some more masculine scents for the bros out there!

Order yours here!

Something to drink:Adagio Tea

The lovely folks from Adagio Teas gave me an opportunity to write about their great teas and products. I have been in tea-drinker heaven! I have greatly enjoyed the quality of their teas and the passion they have poured into telling people about their product.

Check out their line of teas! They even have fandom teas for all my nerd friends out there.

Something to read: Red Rising by Pierce Brown

My dear friend Kelsey and I made reading lists for 2017 based off the Modern Mrs. Darcy 2017 challenge this January. One of the categories on my list was A Book from a Genre I Usually Avoid. For me, that is sci-fi. (Don’t hate me!)
It’s no secret that I get the same buzz off a Penny & Sparrow album that I do off a great novel. On their latest release Let A Lover Drown You is the song “Gold”. The song was inspired by the novel Red Rising by Pierce Brown. I had fallen in love with the song and was intrigued to read the story behind it.
It’s a kind of complicated plot to synthesize, (not to read—enthralling to read) but basically Darrow, a red, discovers—at the expense of everything he holds dear—that his life as a pioneering miner under the surface of Mars is instead slavery to a higher cast, the golds. To bring retribution to the death of his wife, Darrow is disguised as a gold to infiltrate their system and bring it down from the inside. I could NOT put this book down. Loved being surprised and thoroughly sucked in by a genre I’ve neglected.

Something to watch: This. PLEASE!

Working in social and digital media day in and day out, I see a lot of people doing it right. I see a lot of people doing it wrong.

Basically, if you’re on Snapchat or Insta, feel free to have your videos vertical. If you’re anywhere else, PLEASE! For the love of all things holy, make sure you’re filming horizontally. I die a little any time I see a vertical video on a non-vertical platform.

Also, this video is just plain hilarious.

Something to listen to: Addendum

Penny and Sparrow and Corey Kliganon released an EP together last week and it’s wonderful. They combine two of their songs into one new one and the result is fabulous, adding a layer to the original songs while maintaining something wholly original.
It’s available on Noisetrade and the proceeds go to Music and Memory.
Download here!

Teas for Spring

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Lex's World

Returning from Italy, I cannot tell you how much I was looking forward to a big mug of tea. (Don’t worry, an Italy post is to come!)

Italy is a country for coffee drinkers…which I am not. Quality was a little harder to come by and definitely more expensive. I spend most of the time there uncaffeinated. (Not being a coffee addict, this was not as dire as one may think. Just a little sad.)

Thankfully, waiting for me when I returned home was a box of goodies from the lovely folks at Adagio Teas. I received tons of great flavors, but in this post, I want to discuss my favorites of spring.

IngenuiTEA

First, I have to talk about my favorite Adagio product. Many of the coffee and tea shops in Grand Rapids use the IngenuiTEA. I have had to refrain from sneaking the thing into my purse everytime I’ve used one.
Well now I don’t have to. This plastic pot is seriously the easiest way to make loose leaf tea. You just dump in your leaves, pour in your water, steep, and—this is the magic part—set it over your favorite mug. The pressure from the mug lip releases the water out of the bottom of the pot.
The IngenuiTEA pot holds 16oz, perfect for making a quick mug of tea before dashing out the door.
Try it for yourself here

Lavender Earl Grey

I first had this Adagio tea at Squibb’s Coffee Bar and was totally in love. It’s classic Early Grey with a sweet twist that is perfect for spring time. The lightness of the lavender flavor makes Earl Grey a whole new experience.
The floral and citrus flavors hit all the right notes—a dark tea with a light taste. Perfect for spring caffeination.
Try it for yourself here!

Apricot Tea

The company I work for is called Apricot Services and we drink a lot of tea…naturally I requested the Apricot flavor tea for some meta tea experiences in the office.
The tea not only boasts apricot pieces, but apple and the two mingle for a very nice flavor, balancing—not overpowering the black tea. I think this is a hard balance to hit in fruit tea and Adagio hold the flavors in a really great tension.
Try it for yourself here

White Blueberry

I think you can’t go wrong with white tea in warmer months. I’m a sucker for blueberry and thought I’d try the combo of the two. This one was not my favorite warm, but makes a wonderful iced tea. I brewed the tea in the ingenuiTEA pot and then poured it over a glass of ice.
The flavor is more delicate, so if you’re going to drink it warm, DO NOT pour boiling water over these leaves. It is possible to scald your tea and that will make the flavor bitter.
Try it for yourself here

There were more flavors in Adagio’s box of wonders, so I can’t wait to tell you about those. For now, share with me your favorite kinds of tea to drink as the weather warms up.

From Where I Draw My Water

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Lex's World

 

“The ultimate essence of evil—the root, the spring, what makes evil evil—is that we have lost a taste for God.”

I nearly walked off the back of the treadmill as I heard John Piper’s words during the Passion livestream this January.

I had known for a while that I have placed things ahead of God, whether intentional or not. I was aware of the wrongness of that, of course. But to be told that I have committed the ultimate evil—that made me take a few step back…quite literally and almost to my detriment.

Piper was digging into Jeremiah 2, a passage that God has kept pulling me back to the last four months.

Be appalled at this, you heavens,
    and shudder with great horror,”
declares the Lord.
“My people have committed two sins:
They have forsaken me,
    the spring of living water,
and have dug their own cisterns,
    broken cisterns that cannot hold water.

I have lost a taste for that which brings life and I have instead turned to an empty well. I have exchanged that which will quench my thirst, for that which will continue to suck from me until I am dead. I have looked for life where there is none to be had, when the spring of living water is right in front of me. This—Piper says—is the ultimate root of evil. From this, every other sin is permitted to live.

Guess what, friends? I have been so thirsty for so long.

I love what Jesus offers the woman at the well in John 4:

“Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again,  but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

She asks him to give her this water so she does not have to return to the well. Gently—oh so gently—Jesus invites her to unload her brokeness. He tells her he is looking for worshipers in spirit and truth.

He is looking for worshipers who drink from his fountain and he wants her to be one. Her, a woman in a culture that gave women little standing, a woman of a race intended to be his enemy, a woman who had let her hunger for life and acceptance lead her to many unfulfilling lovers. And he talks with her, he steps into her world, into her broken-cistern, dying-of-thirst life and invites her to drink of something better.

He invites us to something better as well. He invites us to drink deep from the freedom he offers. Freedom for money, beauty, power, acceptance. Freedom to not be enough, yet find enough in him.

Jesus is in the ministry of enough-ness. What is offered from his well is the only thing that will bring us life and, trust me, it is enough.

Jennie Allen’s latest book Nothing to Prove has been a great tool for encouragement as I have sought to revive a thirst for God in this season. As she explores the book of John, I was struck by not only God’s beautiful offering to satisfy our thirst, but to be more than enough. If my thoughts here or in my previous post on the topic interest you, I would highly recommend picking up her book!

Friday Favorites: April 2017

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Friday Favorites, Lex's World

I’m excited to be bringing back Friday Favorites! I’m excited to share some sites, products, and worthwhile diversions I think you’ll enjoy.

Something to try: The Skimm

With everything happening in the news in the past year, I found myself getting sucked in and more of my time getting sucked up. And it was soul-sucking.

I needed to set a boundary, but I still wanted to be informed.

Enter The Skimm.

The Skimm is an email that arrives in my inbox every weekday morning. It’s basically SparkNotes for the news. I get all the highlights with links for further reading. I’m able to keep up with the major events in the world, but I don’t have to let it eat up my day.

My favorite Skimm is Friday because they include some great book recommendations.

Subscribe and try it for yourself here!

Something to follow: Grit and Virtue

A friend showed me a killer Instagram account a couple months ago and I have come to love not just Grit and Virtue’s Instagram, but all of their content!

Written to empower young professional women, I have resonated with so much of their articles. If you want a great preview, I recommend you read this or this.

Something to read: Grace is Greater

On my 30-before-30 list, I wrote that I wanted to have a deeper understanding of grace. God’s funny because the next book to cross my desk was Kyle Idleman’s latest, Grace is Greater.

As a follow up to his book Not A Fan, Idleman wanted a chance to explore grace is a way he didn’t get to in the first book. He pulls no punches and his words bring God’s grace into vivid realization.

I found the book to be deeply encouraging and the freedom I found in thinking on it’s themes was so needed.

Pick up your copy here.

Something to watch: Jane the Virgin

While we were both going through Gilmore Girls withdrawl, a coworker recommended Jane the Virgin as a new drug of choice.

The show is a satirical telenovela featuring Jane, a devout catholic young woman who’s grandmother guilted her into maintaining her virginity until marriage. Due to a doctor’s mishap during what was supposed to be a pap smear, Jane finds herself artificially inseminated with her bosses baby…and it only gets crazier from there.

The writing is witty, the acting is spectacular, and the clothes are really fun. Jane the Virgin has become a wonderful guilty pleasure and is the perfect show to start if you’ve found yourself in a rut. The first two seasons are on Netflix!

Something to listen to: Georgica Pond

I had the pleasure of getting to see Johnnyswim live last month. It was a great show and, yes, they are that beautiful in person.

Their sophomore album Georgica Pond released last year. The songs are simultaneously rough and smooth in it’s blend of R&B and Americana. Listening to it this winter has been a burst of summer. If you’re looking for something fresh for your playlist, Georgica Pond is the way to go.

Find A Place in Your City

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Lex's World

I am a firm believer of the importance of place, be that your place in a season of life or your spiritual journey, but mostly physical place.

Though I am not in a relationship, I would argue that I lead a fairly romantic life and this is why:

I am in love with my city.

Grand Rapids is a beautiful and diverse city that loves the arts, food, and beer—all things I can get behind. I love exploring new corners of it, or trying a different restaurant, or just going someplace that is familiar—that’s home.

I think if you live anywhere, bit it for 90 years or just a month, I think you should fine a place that is your “spot.” Go there often. Observe the people there, watch how the light plays with the scenery. Bring a journal and your bible, let that place become your sanctuary. Read there, let your favorite characters enjoy your spot as well.

Find your favorite place in your favorite city and claim it as your own.

Originally from grkids.com

My favorite place is the Pantlind lobby of the Amway Grand Plaza Hotel. It’s decorations remind me of something out of Gatsby. There is a Starbucks around the corner. The armchairs are welcoming and the lighting is warm. It’s absolutely perfect.

I will go there to journal and figure out life. I will share it with close friends like it’s a special secret. I will just take a break from the hectic pace of life and just enjoy.

I think if we are rooted in a place, we need to embrace that place. This might mean finding a physical spot to pass special moments in. This might mean investing in a local church. It might mean making a friend in a city that is still unfamiliar to you.

Be rooted where you are. Fall in love with the city your are planted in. Enjoy the life before you.

Not Enough

Posted on by Lex De Weese in Lex's World

I know you feel it too—that aching sense that you don’t have what it takes, will never have what it takes, and don’t even have a clue what it takes. And that’s just in trying to do your make up in the morning.

I am not enough.

I’m terrible at doing my own hair, I don’t look great in peplum, karaoke is not my jam, and I can’t flip an omelette.

I also am a selfish person, I am only a “good friend” when I want to be, I get easily irritated by things not going my way, and I often speed.

I am not enough. I will never be enough.

But here’s the thing we forget: We were never supposed to be enough.

In Eden, God provided for all of Adam and Eve’s needs. They dwelt in their dependence and relationship with the father. Things went south when they decided God wasn’t enough and they wanted to be.

In Jeremiah 2:13, the prophet writes the two most evil things we have done:

My people have committed two evils: they have forsaken me, the fountain of living waters, and hewed out cisterns for themselves, broken cisterns that can hold no water.

We have decided God was not enough and we have decided to look elsewhere to fulfill our out enoughness.

Friend, there is a reason that when you look at your life, you feel an ache that something is missing. There is a reason I look at my work and feel that it is not where it needs to be. Even the things I am good at, I find discouragement  that there is always someone better or more recognized for that thing.

It’s because I am try to drink from a bone dry well that will never satisfy. I will never be satisfied by my own ability or in what other people or things can provide.

Our brokenness, our longing, our not-enough-ness is supposed to be the craving that draws us back to the only one who can satisfy it. Jesus.

For too long, I’ve been depressed by the fact that I will never look right, say the right thing, or be on the right thing. I beat myself up over where I think I should be, or have done. Small things, like forgetting to send an email before the meeting or even spilling tea inside my bag (True story last week) send me into a tailspin when they really shouldn’t get to me.

I say this: Give it a rest. Rest in the fact that your lack has been covered completely by His righteousness. Mistakes, brokenness, hurts—they do not have the final word.  Do not stress about it. Do not let it weigh you down.You are enough only because your God is enough. You will never be enough on your own.

Jesus’ ministry was one of demonstrating his abundance. I cannot wait to get into this further over the next few weeks. For now, know this:

You don’t have to be enough. Jesus is an abundance.